My wife was standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror. She was not happy with what she saw and said to me, “I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.” I replied, “Your eyesight’s darn near perfect.”
A minister decided that a visual demonstration would add emphasis to his Sunday sermon. Four worms were placed into four separate jars. The first worm was put into a container of alcohol. The second worm was put into a container of cigarette smoke. The third worm was put into a …
Finally a joke about Ontario that does not involve the losing Maple Leafs or the Sens! An Ontarian, a Prince Edward Islander and a Newfie all die and go to hell. While there, they spot a red phone and ask what the phone is for. The devil tells them it …
One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his sweat-shirt, seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, “What setting do I use on the washing machine?” “It depends,” I replied. “What does it say on your shirt?” He yelled back, “University of Oklahoma .” And …