My wife was standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror. She was not happy with what she saw and said to me, “I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.” I replied, “Your eyesight’s darn near perfect.”
Ralph and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital. One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Ralph suddenly jumped into the deep end. Sadly,he sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there. Edna promptly jumped in to save him, she swam to the …
Little Susie was not the best student in catholic school. Usually she slept through the class. One day her teacher, a nun, called on her while she was sleeping. “Tell me Susie, who created the universe?” When Susie didn”t stir, little Johnny who was her friend sitting behind her, took …
It’s okay if you don’t laugh at my jokes. I’m use to doing show for deaf people … and wakes … and Pentecostal prayer meetings. I have to be careful at the prayer meetings. Every time I tell a joke with Jesus in it, as soon as they hear ‘Jesus,’ …