I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous – everyone hasn’t met me yet. Rodney Dangerfield You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She’s 97 today and we don’t know where the …
A man said to his wife one day, “I don’t know how you can be so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time …” The wife responded, “Allow me to explain. God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me …” “God made me stupid so …
An attractive blonde from Cork, Ireland arrived at the casino. She seemed a little intoxicated and bet wenty-thousand Euros on a single roll of the dice. She said, “I hope you don’t mind, but I feel much luckier when I’m completely nude”. With that, she strippedfrom the neck down, rolled …
Ralph and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital. One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Ralph suddenly jumped into the deep end. Sadly,he sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there. Edna promptly jumped in to save him, she swam to the …