Finally a joke about Ontario that does not involve the losing Maple Leafs or the Sens! An Ontarian, a Prince Edward Islander and a Newfie all die and go to hell. While there, they spot a red phone and ask what the phone is for. The devil tells them it …
My wife was standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror. She was not happy with what she saw and said to me, “I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.” I replied, “Your eyesight’s darn near perfect.”
She was standing in the kitchen, preparing our usual soft-boiled eggs and toast for breakfast, wearing only the “T” shirt that she normally slept in. As I walked in, almost awake, she turned to me and said softly, “You’ve got to make love to me this very moment!” My eyes …
Two farmers are in a field. First farmer points to a tree and says, “See that tree? That’s where I lost my virginity.” Second farmer says, “Yeah? Was it good?” First farmer says, “Yeah, till her mom showed up.” Second farmer says, “No way! What’d she say!” First farmer says, …
